The Elvins Attack
by UberLoopy
Summary: Teddy and Victoire decide to play a prank while Victoire's questioning their relationship. Written for the JelloFanclub January Challenge. Oneshot! Makes me smile when I think about it!


**A/N: Written for the Jello Fanclub January challenge. I love it so much; I think it's my best piece of work yet! Yayness!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter !!**

Teddy sat with Victoire's head in his lap, playing with her hair. She was reading a book and he was thinking about a various amount of different things.

"I wanna do something funny," Victoire said randomly, closing her book and putting it on her chest. "Like, really funny." She said.

Teddy smiled. "Like turning all the house elves into Jello?" He asked.

"OH MY GOSH TEDDY YOU ARE A GENIUS!" Victoire shouted, standing up. People looked at her oddly and she blushed and sat down. "How will we do that?"

"Well, there has to be a potion somewhere that turns things into Jello," Teddy said. People were still staring.

"Let's go somewhere more private," Victoire said, tugging on his hand and going to his dormitory. A few of his roommates were in there, studying for exams.

"Oi, we have important things to discuss," she said to them. "Scat."

The two boys looked at her and knew how she could get. They exchanged glances then ran away.

"Oh, the things that people remember from third year," Victoire said, falling back onto Teddy's bed. "So where would the Turn-things-into-Jello potion be?" She asked. Teddy sat down and pulled a couple pixi-sticks from his bedside drawer and tossed one to Victoire.

"I'm guessing restricted section since it could be very dangerous."

"Are you sure it's a _potion_. And not a... uhm... _spell_?" She asked. "We could ask McGonagall..."

"Then she'd know it was us and we'd get smothered in detentions," Teddy said.

"Well... let us go to the restricted section tonight..."

"Or the room of requirements," Teddy said.

"You're so smart." Victoire said.

----

"This book is wonderful! We even have all the ingredients. Let's see... Oh merlins crap," Victoire said. "We need _three gallons of Jello_."

"That's easy," Teddy said, waving his wand. Ten gallons of Jello appeared in front of him.

"Three Teddy, not Ten." She said, hiting him off the top of the head.

Teddy stuck his tongue out at her and she grabbed it.

"E! At i oe!"

"What? What was that? I couldn't hear you? Cat got your tongue?" Victoire asked. Teddy grabbed her hand and she let go at his grip, melting into his eyes. They sat there for a moment then Teddy snapped out of it.

"Okay," Teddy said, looking at the book.

"Teddy, why are you always like that?"

"We need all this stuff... think if we just hope for it the room will give it to us?" Victoire sighed as Teddy ignored her question.

"Probably," she whispered sadly.

---

"OI!" Teddy shouted to the elvins in the kitchen. They all looked at him. "I want you all to drink this."

They each lined up for him to drink the potion. They each turned to Jello, but could still walk and listen. Some where green, while others were yellow, blue, or red.

"Now, in the middle of Dinner you guys need to exit in a march formation. Blue ones get in a line and go towards the Hufflepuffs, yellow ones get in a line and march towards the Ravenclaws. Green ones, you need to march towards the Gryffindors, and red ones need to march towards the Slytherins. When you're walking chat 'We will eat you. We will eat you.' In a robotic way. Are we clear?"

Each of their jiggley Jelloy heads nodded. Teddy and Victoire smiled satisfactorily and left happily.

"This is going to be priceless..." Victoire said. Teddy smiled and took her hand and started skipping down the hallways, dragging her behind him. She laughed at him.

"Teddy," She said, trying to get him to stop. She couldn't let go of his hand because he had such a tight grip on hers and she just ran after his speedy skipping. He finally stopped and she laughed at him. He was out of breath and sweating. She still thought he was beautiful.

--

Victoire sat across from Teddy at dinner that night. She was next to Gabby, her best friend, and he was sitting next to Jose, his best friend. Victoire was trying to stay calm, excited for the great adventure, but couldn't. She was bouncing her legs up and down in anticipation, waiting for the Jello-elves to come and attack. The food showed up and Victoire and Teddy put a lot of food on their plates. Gabby was talking Victoire up about something, Victoire had stopped listening a while before, and Teddy was talking to Jose about transfiguration class.

There was the sound of "Squish squish" coming from the hallway and Teddy smiled at Victoire. Their eyes lit up as they made eye contact.

"What did you guys do now?" Gabby asked looking from one to the other. "What's that noise?" She asked accusingly. Victoire shrugged, holding her laugh in, thinking about the elves coming to attack the Hogwarts students. A chant started.

"We will eat you. We will eat you. We will eat you. We will eat you."

Victoire bursted into laughter and so did Teddy. The surrounding Gryffindors stared at them, but their gazes quickly turned to a first year running into the great hall.

"WE'RE UNDER ATTACK WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!" He screamed as the Jello-elves walked in chanting "We will eat you." in a robotic way. Victoire laughed even harder as the whole School flipped out, even Gabby and Jose who were expecting something bizarre spazzed out and threw potatoes at random people. It soon broke out into an all-school free-for-all food fight.

Curses started flying and people started screaming even louder.

"WHAT DO WE DO?" Teddy shouted.

"ACT NORMAL!" Victoire shouted. She started to scream. "OH MERLIN! MOTHER I LOVE YOU!" She said, like it was her last words. She ran towards the Jello elves with a knife cutting them up. It just caused the little pieces of Jello to turn into walked Jello clumps.

"Argh!! WE'RE SURROUNDED!" A fourth year screamed, running to the corner and getting in fetal position. Victoire fell to the floor in laughter, squishing a blue elf on her way down. Because of that there were little Jello-elves, squeaking "We will eat you." Running from her. The whole hall was a commotion. All the teachers were in awe that a student, or _two_, would do this. Victoire ran to the corner with the kid in fetal position and joined him, rocking back and forth. The sounds of "We will eat you." Were still clear and she had a hard time keeping her laughs in. A few more kids joined them and then there were at least thirty kids in the corner when she looked up. All rocking back and forth. They included all the prefects, except the Slytherin ones, who were throwing Jello elves at a variety of different students, and the head boy and girl. Victoire smiled and then rocked back and forth again. It was better than she had imagined.

Victoire felt a hand on her shoulder and she looked up to see Teddy. He motioned for her to get up. She stood up and he shoved some Jello in her face.

"Oh no you didn't!" As the Jello pieces walked off of her and to the floor. She picked up a fairly big Jello-elf and shoved it down Teddy's shirt and squished it in him.

He started squirming around and Victoire laughed at his dance and ran away, out the great hall and down the hallway. Jello free. She sat down against the wall and smiled. This was probably the funniest night ever. She leaned her head back and heard footsteps coming from her left. She looked over and saw Teddy emerging from the great hall, a few pieces of Jello escaping his hair and clothes. He ran over to her and sat down next to her and took her hand.

"Think the reproducing thing was supposed to happen?" Teddy asked.

"I think it was a malfunction... but who cares. It was hilarious," Victoire said, taking her hand from Teddy. She sat there silently with him awkwardly. She wanted to ask him but couldn't.

She finally got up the courage. "Teddy," she whispered. "Where do we stand?"

"Well, right now we're sitting..." He said, being a brat.

"Teddy, I'm serious. I don't want to leave this spot not knowing where we stand. Tell me, where do we stand?"

"Victoire, I don't want to go into a job with previous commitments. It just... I want to focus on my job for the next few years, Vic. I don't want to see you hurt because I can't make it to a Hogsmade weekend; or because I don't have time to write you." Victoire started crying. But they weren't real tears, they were Jello tears. She wanted to be Teddy's girlfriend. But she knew where he was standing. He looked at her and started laughing.

"What?" She asked through her Jello tears.

"You're crying Jello," He said. She laughed and he gave her a hug.

"So, think we should head up to the dorms so we don't get in trouble?" Teddy asked. Victoire nodded and stood up and the two ran upstairs to the Gryffindor Common room, leaving a Jello trail behind them.

**A/N: MY BEST FIC IN MY OPINION I'VE EVER WRITTEN!**


End file.
